Why, oh why?

(Note: If you are a smoker, you might not actually enjoy this. You can click ‘Ctrl + W’ now. Thank you.)

I don’t like smoking; never have. I find it a vile habit – selfish, intrusive, and .. well .. kind of stupid. There, that’s my disclaimer. Here is my rant:

 Why the hell must smokers throw their cigarettes on the ground?

Perhaps it is because my mother drilled into us that littering was bad. Perhaps it is because I find it rude.  Perhaps I am completely alone in this sentiment.  I DON’T CARE!  If it is not okay for me to throw my snot-filled tissue out on the sidewalk, then why is it okay to throw out a cigarette butt? (Hygiene aside, of course.) You know the one that really gets me?  People who throw them out of cars!  WTF?  You have a freakin’ ashtray right there!  Wait .. let me guess.  You don’t want your car to smell like cigarettes, right?!  Here’s an idea:  STOP SMOKING.  Then nothing that you own will smell like cigarettes, including the sidewalks.  Newsflash: the sidewalks are technically ‘ours’, not ‘yours’, so how about this?  Save all your dirty cigarette butts and dump them on YOUR sidewalk.

Once, while waiting in the car for my husband, a woman flicked her cigarette out of her parked convertible and ONTO our car!!  Then, to make matters worse, she did not even get out of her car to get it out.  So, I got out of the car, picked up the cancer stick and threw it back on her car.  (sidebar: she might have kicked my ass had she not been sucking face with someone in the car and much more interested in slobber exchange than fighting with me! I digress.)

I am sure that a few of you are thinking … what’s the big deal?  Aren’t there so many other things we could focus on? NO!  This is my rant and I can shout if I want to … shout if I want to … shout if I want to. (I digress, again.  Sorry.)  Here is my devious plot: from this date forward, I will pick up cigarette butts and throw them back at their owners.  If I can’t find their owners, then I will simply throw them at someone.  Eventually I will become known as that ‘crazy anti-cigarette butt lady’ and get my own reality show.  BWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA.

Join me for the revolution, will ya?

I might have also ranted about this here: